29 Questions

What is life when you cannot live the way you want?

What is liberty when your choices are clouded by invisible rules and countless norms?

 What is will when it is dependent on one’s nature?

What is life without love?

What is love without passion?

 What is intimacy without covenant and exclusivity?

What is relationship if pure lust?

What is the essence of your existence?

Who are you without breath, without knowledge, and naked?

Who are you living for a moment yet bleeding inside?

Who are you walking barefoot under the scorching sun?

Who are you gazing the lunar eclipse?

Who are you dreaming about an impossible future with your Hollywood crush?

Who are you trying to be accepted by the majority yet you are in constant battle of accepting your identity?

Who are you trying to meddle in other people’s lives when you have your own troubles?

Why are you diving into the depths of an unknown ocean?

Why is your heart beating and your mind wandering?

Why are you hoping for a future that you might not meet?

Why do you desire for things you do not have?
Why do you despise the things you already possess?

Why are you in search for pearls when you have gold in your hands?


Why are you acquainted in the world who wants to possess and manipulate you and your will?

Why are you paralyzed by this world that you are supposed to take dominion?

Why are you succumb by the immortality of your so-called universe?

How long can you go from the busyness of your life ,when it is in fact static?

How many times will you ride in the rapid state of this strange world you deem as home?

Who are you?

Where are you going?

How deep can you truly fathom yourself?


Dear Anonymous,

Can I love you more today than yesterday?

Is it possible to love a person that much?

Can my heart expand, take all the love in the world and give it to you?

Cheers to this day for you are so fortunate that I think of you

and a kiss for someday that we’ll meet.


Yours truly,


Cafe Blues

As she was staring blankly on her laptop screen, she realized that she has been on that stillness for four minutes. I did not mind for I was comically caught up in a scene of Dostoevsky’s Crime and Punishment. She looked into her Caramel Macchiato, her favorite, and realized that it has lost its warmth. Disturbed by  her unlikely gestures and soft ramblings, I thought of what could be on her mind. I felt my heart saying, “It’s not what is on her mind but what is going on in her heart.” Before I was able to ask her, she looked into my eyes and started her monologue (as she always does).

I’ve been here couple of times already. This feeling of wanting to let someone dear to you just vanish. Yeah, vanish. Exactly. For years, he had been part of me. But now, I wanted to end everything.

Our love is boring. But as each time I ponder on what we’ve been through I feel like it’s not the distance nor the length of time we spent with each other. At the end of the day, it’s the depth of love we have.Tell me, can you really measure love? Or it’s just the intensity you feel for the one you love?

But I can still say that we had a great love. Our love once floated in the sky. It flew right on the clouds!

Now, we’re sinking in this deep blue underwater. He turned into this boring old man, or did I just realized it just now? PERHAPS I am the one who is all throughout senseless.

I wanted to dive in the deep, sink into the bottom ’til I die there. I want the seas to bury me deep along with all the memories of him in my head, all the emotions stuck in my heart.  Let the fishes  feast on every feeling. May the sands bury me and my love for him. The silent moonlit be the  only witness of this absurdity.

She lowered her voice looking forlorn and ended with these phrases:

When love’s like sinking underwater, there is only one thing left to do– LET GO.

The question is, can I really let go?

Finally I got the chance to speak and told her:

Is there a need to let go? How can you let go of someone dear to you? How do you let go from a cascading love? Maybe you just need to convince yourself, if not push a little more harder to REALLY LET GO.

She looked away with no intentions of answering back. She mused herself with the people passing by and slowly  drank her now cold coffee.  And so I relaxed on my seat and continued reading.